*Warning* Cranky hormonal ramblings, little pregnancy content.
Damnit. When I started trying to get pregnant (a year ago), I had two friends with little babies and didn't know anyone who was pregnant. By the time I got pregnant, there was one other person in my extended circle who was pregnant but we were only a few weeks apart! That was exciting. Then I miscarried... and did it again and time moved on for my friend's pregnancy and not for mine.
Now I'm pregnant again and two of my friends are pregnant and in their second trimesters and it just sucks watching everyone else I know get pregnant successfully and getting to announce it to the world. I just found out about one of them today. Thus the rant.
I realize that I am currently pregnant, saw the heartbeat on Friday and I have no reason for concern, but I can't help it. I'm being eaten by fear and it sucks. It's also really sad to go back a few days in how far along I am. I'm tried of making the happy face for my friends who are successfully pregnant now.
I think I need to start telling people. Not because I'm positive that this will all work out this time, but I'm much more emotional about it than I would like to admit. If this goes well great, no harm done telling people too early. If this doesn't go well, I am going to need the support. I think it really broke me to find out that another friend is in her second trimester.
Days Pregnant: 44
Days to go: 236